You’re probably going to laugh at me and tell me I should have figured this out years ago, but I never realized how much fun it can be to chill on top of Dad’s stereo speakers! He had them pumping tonight with something Mom calls EDM, and when I crawled up there my fat was jiggling all over the place. It was surprisingly relaxing, and I think I was getting a workout at the same time! It was definitely fun.

I’m in a rather excited mood tonight.  That’s because I’m Alley, the master of bug killing, and I just killed a huge cricket in Mom and Dad’s bedroom.  I bet they’re going to be very proud of me because that thing would have kept them up all night.  It makes quite a tasty snack, too.

Maybe I should advertise my services as a professional bug killer.  After all I’m super awesome and strong.  I’m not afraid of anything (well almost).  I am kitteh.  Here me meow!  I can leap steel buildings in a single bound…as long as their teeny tiny steel building scaled down to the size of little sister’s doll house.

Oh my goodness I just about had a heart attack. I was minding my own business taking a nap in the couch when I heard a noise. I poked my head out from under my blanket (yes I have my own blanket), and what did I see? I saw a GIGANTIC kitty running towards me. It was so huge it was my size, and it was running on 2 legs! I about jumped out of my skin thinking some nuclear mutant kitty had come to eat me. We do live near Duke Power, ya know, so I bet there’s all kind of mutant things around there. Why couldn’t there be a mutant kitty?

The good news is there is no mutant kitty in our house.  It was just lil sister trying on her Halloween costume.  She wants to be a kitty like Alley for Halloween, and boy did she look like one!  I wonder if Mommy will be a kitty, too.  Maybe she’ll be a bulldog like me. She’ll probably order her a costume and maybe something for Daddy, too. Daddy doesn’t really like to dress up, though. I just hope she doesn’t make me wear a costume this year. Now that she’s got lil sister to dress up she let me off the hook last year.

Alley is in soooo much trouble tonight!  Mommy, Daddy, and Little Sister went out for awhile, and while they were gone Alley found Mommy’s bin of supplies in the bedroom she uses to make gift baskets for a new baby.

She makes cute little handmade items to go in the baskets as well as these diaper cake things. I think she’s making little hair bows now, too. Anyways Alley found the bin and managed to get the lid off it. Then he climbed up in it and found the ribbon. You know where this is going. It’s not good! He thought the ribbon looked fun to play with, and he pulled it all out, tangled it up, and shredded some of it. I hid under lil sister’s bed when I heard them come home because I knew it wasn’t going to be pretty. Mommy went CA-RA-ZIE when she came home and saw the mess. Alley is now banished to the utility room while Mommy cleans the mess up, and I doubt he’ll be getting any kitteh treats tomorrow!

Okay I lied.  She isn’t starving me, but for a minute I saw the empty Purina bag and thought I would wither away to nothing.  Daddy saved the day when he went to the closet and pulled out another huge bag full of my favorite noms!

Mommy stocked up on dog food when it was on sale a few weeks ago.  She came home with four big bags of Purina because it was on sale for $8.99 AND she had $2 off coupons.  She got Alley a bag of cat food, too, and it’s so big it’ll probably take him all year to get through it!  I’m glad Mommy stocked up because I heard her say there isn’t much money this week to buy stuff, and I need food or I’ll starve to death.

Mommy’s job just doesn’t make enough right now to support us all, and Daddy still hasn’t been able to find a new job.  He did some work for a few friends, but that money is running out, too.  I’m so sad because if they can’t buy food for me they can’t buy food for lil sister either.  She can’t starve!  Maybe Daddy should go back to school to be a Dental Tech.  I saw a bunch of Dental Technician Jobs in the paper this morning when I was doing my job of holding it down on the floor while Mommy clipped coupons from the inserts. Hey maybe I can get a job doing that! Anybody need me to lie on the floor and hold their paper down? I’m good at it?