Did yous has good weekends?  I has good weekends!  I did nots gets to has outdoor birfday parties yesterdays like I wants, but dats ok.  It rains and rains all day, but I still gets to has funs.

Mommy gots me new hotdog toys I would show yous, but I already eateds da end off its.  She says she nots buy dat kinds no more because dey not good enough for bullies like me who chews and chews and chews.  Wez guys needs tough toys!  She gets me new toy dis weeks after Daddy gets his paychecks because toys cost moneez.

Dats ok cuz it was still lots and lots of funs while I hads it to plays wif.  Da best toy of da day was ackshully free and lots and lots of fun.  We had a grasshoppers dat gots stuck in da house, and me and Alley plays wif it for a longs time. It would hops under da tv stand, and Alley woulds bats it back outs. Den I woulds bounce rounds it til it jumps agains. We played wif it til it finally dies and Daddy threws it outsides.

I know. Sometimes we cruel, but only to stoopid bugs dat don’t needs to be in my houses!

How was your week?  Ours was not so good akshully.  We got lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of rain dat made everyfing super dupers wet.  It made da creeks and da rivers and da lakes overflows, and dere was water EVERYWHERES!

It even ruins my birfday!  I didn’t gets to has my party like Mommy and Alley said I was, but Mommy says she makes it ups to me wif a party dis weekends wif all my puppeh and kitteh friends.  Maybe Alley can invites his friends, too, because I saw a games today I wants to plays and I might need his friends to helps.

Don’t dis looks like lots of funs to plays?

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

I think it would be lots and lots of funs, and now dat it’s not rainings like crazy anymores we could plays it outsides!

Man I so glad it nots raining no more. When it rains I don’t like to goes outsides to pees because I gets my feet wets. It rained so many days dat Mommy hads to put puppeh pads in da hoomans bafrooms so I didn’t has to holds it anymores. I just glad we still has a bafrooms and a house because lots of puppehs and kittehs in da south, speshully Atlanta don’t has houses right now. Dey all under waters just like da roads and stuffs was around heres.

I didn’t gets to see da roads under waters because Mommy mades me stays homes but she said it was not goods. Da rivers was over our roads for almost 2 whole days. Dere was lots of mudslides and bridges washed aways, and Mommy says dere were lots and lots of wrecks and cars stranded.

I bet if da New York accident lawyers peoples in da ads I see came down here right now dey would has plenty of peoples needing der helps. Mommy says it was a madhouse out ders, whatever dat is. She said dere were even some stoopid hoomans who tried to drives thru da waters. Lots of dem got der cars stuck, and some hads to get other hoomans to rescues dem.

Stoopid hoomans. Even a puppeh likes me knows cars are for land and boats are for waters. I shud know because I likes cars, but I don’t likes boats. I might fall out boats and drown if I don’t has my life jacket because I cant swims, and dat scares me!

Ok I think I needs to go plans my party nows. Da suns is shining, its not wet anymores, and now dat I’m 3 I’m ready to rocks dis weekends!

Wow I got an email from the vet man this morning!  It says:

Alley!

Look in the mail box next week. Your reminder is coming attached to the latest issue of HealthyPet Magazine, so be on the lookout for it! We look forward to seeing you and [Mom and Dad names removed] during your next visit.

Alley you are due for:

9/23/2009 Wellness Exam; Feline 4-7 Year

Sincerely,

The Staff at
Fox Nest Veterinary Hospital

You know this is good and bad all at the same time. I love getting surprises, and I can’t wait to get my free magazine, but I don’t want my Wellness Exam.  The Wellness Exam is my big yearly checkup, and that means I’m going to get poked and prodded.  I’ll have to get my shots, and I hate shots.

I bet Mom is making a list of stuff to talk to the vet about like all the weight I’ve gained since last year, and how I throw up more these days.  I’ve always had a problem with throwing up because I eat my food too fast, but over the last week I’ve been doing it a lot.  I meow for food, Mom puts more food in my bowl, I eat it fast, I get sick, and then I meow for more.  Now Mom says no you can’t have more!  She’s regulating how much I eat, and she wants to make sure there isn’t a new reason I’m getting sick after I eat.  I bet she’ll ask the vet how to burn fat when it comes to kittehs, too, so I won’t be so fat anymore. I hope he doesn’t say I need to go for walks like Bubba does!  I don’t want to go on a diet either!

Do you know the worst part of all?  I have to ride to the vet guy’s place in that box hoomans call a cat carrier.  I get sick and throw up all over the place inside those boxes, so maybe I’ll get lucky and not need one.  Last time I went to the vet Mom and Dad didn’t make me ride in it on the way home because I kept throwing up everywhere.  I bet that was because I was all doped up from surgery, but maybe they won’t make me this time either.

Bubba knows I’m going to the vet man, and he’s laughing at me.  Little does he know he has to go, too!

Oh boy!  I just founds out I might gets to have lots of funs dis weekends!  Daddy said if I good boy today I might gets to go camping wif Mommy and Daddy dis weekends.  We has lots of funs camping.  I has to miss my favorte tv shows like Dog Whisperer ( I wouldn’t has to if we had a Slingbox), but I has too much fun swimmings, hiking, and playing in da lakes to really cares.  Maybe Mommy will even remembers to set da DVR so I can watches it when we gets home!

Daddy says if we wants to go campings dis year in da nice camping weathers we needs to do it now before Mommy gets to fat big to dos it.  My widdle sister in her tummy is making her lots bigger every day, and if Mommy gets too big she won’t have no funs.  Once widdle sister gets here she’s gonna sleeps, poops, eats, and cries too much to go campings right now.  Maybe we can takes her next year and she can plays in da lakes wif me!

I learned my lesson.  If I want anything done around here I need to blog about it.  Then Gramma Kayce reads it, and she fusses at Dad until it gets done.  Score one for the kitteh.  I am the king!

Just let me keep thinking that, mmkay?

You know if Dad would spend less time playing video games and shopping for cigars online and more time taking care of my needs I might be nicer to him. Then again he’d have to be nicer to me, too, and I just don’t see that happening.  We’ve learned to hate each other mutually, and after 6 years there’s no going back now.

Oh well I have a clean litter box, a full food dish, and a full water bowl.  Dad’s not home to kick me off the computer or his favorite pillow (evil laugh), so what more do I have to complain about?  Bah, I think it’s time to go torture Bubba.  Maybe that will entertain me for awhile.