Normalies I has to fights wif Mommy to gets ‘puders time because she hogs it lookin at boring stuffs like life insurance rates and payin bills. Dis weeks has been really differents because Mommy hasn’t wanted to use da compuders a lot. She’s spent lots of times in da bafrooms being sicks den in da beds sleepings.

Alley says Mommy’s gonna has a babies, and babies in her tummy makes her sicks. He says it’ll be longs time before babies gets here, but I can’t waits! I’m gonna has a new friend to plays wif! Alley’s not happy because he says babies are means to cats and pulls der tails and stuffs. Alley’s just grumpy and he don like anything!

I only came out of hiding long enough to tell you I will be returning to hiding forever.  There is no use for me in this household any longer.  I just found out horrible news that will change the rest of my life forever.

Mom, I learned to deal with it when you started bringing those wretched dogs into the house.  I coped, and I pretend to be friends so you’ll feed me and love me.  This time you’ve just gone too far.  A baby?  Really?  Why do we need one of those slobbery stinky crying small human things in this house?  Aren’t Bubba and I enough for you?

Where do you get a human baby anyway?  If that horrible stork brings it can I eat the stork?  That’d be a nice big bird meal for me.  Do you buy it at the store?  I can just see Dad running the barcode scanner across it’s rear as you pick out the one you want.

Nevermind. I don’t care where it comes from. All that matters is that you’re invading my space with that crying pooping thing, and I will not stand for it! I shall return to my mystery hiding spot until you change your minds.

You can change your mind, can’t you? No?

Sigh. This is what I have to look forward to in my old age…being chase by slobbering brats while they pull my tail and ears. Mom, Dad, I hate you.

Do you ever feel like scratching your Mom’s eyeballs out?  I do today!  I don’t know what Mom was thinking, but she got me a collar with bells and these ugly jewel things on it.  Mom, I’m a cat.  I’m not supposed to wear jewelry or collars! Collars are for dogs!

What makes it really bad is the bells. There are 3 little bells, and when I run through the house Bubba hears me. I can’t sneak up on him anymore for an attack, and he hears the bells and wants to chase them.

Mom, this is NOT fun. I suggest you return this wretched thing to the stupid store immediately and get your money back. Otherwise you will find it shredded into a million pieces as soon as I figure out how to get this blasted thing off my neck!

Oh, and put the camera away.  I will not allow you to take photos of me wearing this stupid thing.  I will be in hiding until you agree to remove it.

That is all.

I has been busy busy busy all weeks! I know I hasn’t been writings, but I had so muches to do.  Firsts it’s warms again, so Mommy lets me go play outsides a lot.  Dat takes up lots of times and energies, so after I plays I wants to sleeps a lots. Den Mommy gots me new chew toys, so I hads to spend lots of times chewing because dats what us Bulldoggies do. Den I wents back outsides to plays more, and der were lots and lots of squirrels and birds so I hads to chases dem outa my yards! Whew it was lots to do!

I also been spending lots of times wif da other family peoples dis weeks.  I gots to spend times with Gamma Kayce todays and Aunt Brittany keeps coming to sees me. Den todays I hads to helps Daddy puts togever our new grills so he could makes yummy foods. See how I becomes such a busy doggies?

Mommy has been real busy, toos, because she wants to go backs to schools.  She’s spending lots of times trying to finds what schools she wants to go to onlines so she can stays home wif me and Alley.  We don’t wants her to leaves us to go to schools, but we know she wants to go to schools so she can gets a programming jobs and makes lots of moneez to buys us new toys!

Plus she still has to cleans da house and cooks da food and takes me for walks and give me baths and buy me toys and takes care of Daddy and Alley, too! I dun know how she does it alls because she still finds times to works and rides da motorcycles! I don has dat much energies so I’m glad I’s a bulldoggie who gets to lays around chewings on my toys and spending times wif my peoples.

Mommy says it’s 83 dabreeze outside.  Dat must be when da sun is shiney and it feels warms because it feels gooooooods outside today!  Mommy tooks me for a walks dis morning before it gots hots, but she lets me play a little bits dis afternoons while she hungs out da laundreez.  I founds a stick, and she toughts I looks cute, so she took picshures of me wif my stick.

Gots 83 dabreeze.  Gots a stick. Gots to plays outsides.  Could dis day get any betters?